Brenda's Cancer
by Errant Wrath
Summary: Originally KelleyAndSteve4Ever's Plot. What if in the episode Its only a Test the lump that Brenda found in her Left Breast really had turned out to be cancer? How would the gang have coped? & What effects could this have had on future pairings?
1. The Call

**Disclaimer: **I own neither the plot nor the series Beverly Hills 90210. Beverly Hills 90120 is owned by Paramount and CBS. The plot was bestowed on me by MargretAndHawkeye4Ever. Also most of these lines are taken directly from the episode, "It's Only A Test", which is the episode that inspired this fic.

**Author's Note: **First of all I would like to dedicate this first chapter to you, MargretAndHawkeye4Ever for allowing me to have and finish this plot for you. Thank you so much MargretHawkeye4Ever for trusting me. I hope this story is everything you wanted it to be. Second, I hope all my TT fans won't kill me for starting yet another fic. Lol. Thirdly please do be kind this is my first Beverly Hills 90210 fanfiction. And Fourthly Thank you to those of you that do read and review this chapter, keep in mind constructive criticism is welcome flames are not (there is a difference). With all that said at last…

**Beverly Hills 90210- **

**Brenda's Cancer**

**Chapter 1 **

**The Call**

_It just isn't fair_, thought Brenda Walsh as she sat on the edge of one of the white cushy chairs in her living room rocking back and forth anxiously. _Why is it that while all of our friends are off just worrying about some stupid test, Me, Brandon, Dylan, and the rest of my family are stuck sitting here waiting around for doctor Danna to call and let us know the results of my biopsy. I shouldn't have to worry about things like this. Not at my age. Why can't I be fretting some test like other boys and girls my age are right now? _She thought feeling sorry for herself, which in this case she figured she was entitled to do as she looked around the room at her family.

Her mother flipped aimlessly through a Better Homes and Gardens Magazine for about less than a mill-a-second before she would glance at Brenda's father with wide doe eyes, while her boyfriend Dylan McKay stood by their fireplace rocking back and fourth restlessly, on the balls of his feet with his right hand balled up in a fist in front of his mouth, all except for his thumb which he was chewing on the nail of nervously, but worst off all was her "big", twin brother Brandon, who was pacing to and fro behind the sofa like a tiger in a cage at the Zoo.

Finally Brenda couldn't take it anymore. "Mom, it's almost been three hours." She burst out trying to sound more agitated than frightened.

"I'm sure she'll call any moment" Her mother told her with forced confidence.

"And when she does I'll answer it." Brenda asserted, wanting, no needing to take control the uncontrollable situation.

"Fine." Said her mother as she practically bolted from her seat. "Can I get anyone something to eat?" she asked wanting to find something to keep herself occupied for the time being, anything to keep her from thinking about her sister, Shelia's death and how she felt like she was reliving that now with her teenage daughter.

"Doesn't anyone know anymore jokes?" Brenda asked the room, as apparently no one was hungry because her mother's previous request had been overlooked. "Dylan?" she added quietly a few minutes later as her own question went unnoticed.

"None that I could tell here." He told her attempting to lighten the mood with some playful humor, but his heart wasn't really in it.

Brenda rolled her eyes and sighed heavily with trepidation. Then abruptly the doorbell rang.

DING DONG!

Her mother immediately bolted from her seat on the couch once more and grabbed the phone tightly. "Hello?" she said quickly; without thinking.

"Honey," said her father sympathetically as he put a hand on her shoulder. "It's the doorbell."

"Dad, see I told she would answer it" Brenda pronounced smartly as she went to get the door.

When Brenda opened the door, she was pleasantly surprised by the sight of her two best friends Kelly and Danna who had come barring gifts. "Guys I'm not dead." Said Brenda warmly with a nervous yet genuine sort of half chuckle in her voice. She really was glad to see them.

"Are you alright?"

"Are you okay?"

Both girls asked Brenda one after the other not really giving her time to answer. Kelly handed Brenda a huge basket with a big red ribbon on it. And Brenda leaned to place it on the table near the door Danna moved with her to set down her present adjacent to the basket as well (an arrangement of pink and white lilies). "I don't know yet" replied Brenda once both presents were safely placed on the hall table. "We're still waiting for the call." She informed them while she gesticulated for them to join the rest of her family in the living room, which they did and she followed suit after shutting the door gently behind her.

RING! RING!!

_At last the phone! _Thought Brenda relieved, and frightened all at the same time.

RING!!

It sounded again before she made it to the cordless phone, picked it up off the charger and hit the talk button before she placed her ear to the receiver and spoke into it.

"Hello" she said glancing up nervously at her parents. "Yes, this is Brenda." She affirmed to the individual on the other end of the line. "Hi Doctor Danna" she greeted her physician expectantly.

"Uh huh" she answered her vaguely.

"Uh huh" Brenda said again, but this time her voice sounded more distant, more remote. It conveyed just enough of a hint of incomprehension to make her family and friends uneasy as they eyed her warily.

"Yes…I understand. We'll be there." She said in the same isolated, business like tone. As she hung up the phone Brenda's composure began to crumple as she herself crumpled to the floor wanting to cry but somehow just vaguely numb enough that she couldn't.

"Brenda" her mother spoke her name soft and desperate as she quickly got to the ground and placed her arm a crossed her daughters shoulders.

"What is it?" She pleaded of her, but it was like Brenda was a shell of her former self incapable of speech. She could not utter so much as syllable let alone repeat the words that doctor Danna had said.

"I am sorry; Brenda but you have Breast Cancer. I will need to see you and your family for a conference of sorts, where I can give you more information and we can sit down and talk. And I will be able to answer all yours and your parent's questions. Can you come in on 15th?" Doctor Danna had said.

"Brenda you have Brest Cancer, Brenda you have Breast Cancer, Brenda you have…" the sentence kept repeating and resounding in her head like a broken record. She shook her head back and forth to try and make it stop but when it didn't she just started to thrash her head back more violently until she was banging it back against the wall and at last, although unconsciously the tears had started to fall.

"Brenda, Brenda Stop" Mrs. Walsh solicited trying to call her daughter back to her, she felt so lost and she didn't know what to do. It hurt so much to see her daughter this way.

Obviously, whatever the doctor had told Brenda had not been good news, but Mrs. Walsh still needed to hear it. "Brenda please, what did she say?" she begged tears openly trickling down the woman's cheeks as she tried to reach her daughter.

Dylan, Danna, Kelly, Brandon and Mr. Walsh all watched in horror as Brenda continued to bang her head back and cry, while in her head Brenda just tried to keep on denying what she had been told. _No. No. No. This isn't happening. This is a dream. No. A Nightmare. Yes, a nightmare. Just a bad, bad dream and any moment now I-I'll wake up an-and everything will be-alright. I probably just fell asleep studying for the SATs, that's all. I'll wake up and there will be an open book underneath me and it will have a nice big puddle of drool in it. _She tried telling herself. _Yes, that's it._ She mentally told herself as she tried to gain control of her emotions. The denial game was helping and soon she stopped crying and was just sitting stone still and silent with her back against the wall. Her eyes glazed over as she tried telling herself a different lie. _It could be a mistake. If I'm not asleep it must be a mistake we'll go down there like the Doctor said and then she'll just say that it was all mistake and that we should just go home and forget this whole thing ever happened. _This lie was more helpful, it seemed more legit; something she could put stock in. She nodded to herself as her family watched her worriedly

"Brenda, are you alright?" Brandon said as he joined his mother and sister on the floor.

Brenda simply nodded. She was alright…now. Now that this whole mess had been sorted out inside her head she thought.

"Then can you tell us what the doctor said now, honey?" her father asked her delicately now on the floor on her other side.

Brenda nodded. "She said that I have Breast Cancer, but that she wants us to meet with on her the 15th so she can give us more information, and answer any questions that we may have then." Brenda answered calmly too calmly.

Her friends and family all looked a mixture of shocked and concerned. None of them knew what to do least of all Dylan. All he knew was that he was afraid and that he didn't know what to do and that he didn't like it, _Some boyfriend I am _he thought bitterly. He felt inadequate, useless and ashamed.

There Brenda was, right there. Crumpled on the floor a mess and all he could do was stand here and do nothing. He couldn't get to her like he would have liked to with her family all around her, not that he was so sure he wanted that…he was almost afraid to touch her. Afraid she would break.

He remembered back to when she'd first told him about the lump that day at her locker. He'd felt this way then too, only it seemed to have passed quicker. Dylan shook himself. _Stop thinking like that. She's your girlfriend, man and you love her. She needs you, Dylan, Be a man. _He told himself, but still the fear didn't pass and he didn't know where it had come from, but suddenly there was this voice in his head and though he fought it at first, it didn't take long for it to where him down as the voice was his own. It was the voice of instinct. His own instinct, and his instinct told him to _RUN! _

So, that was what Dylan had done. Suddenly and without warning. Dylan had bolted from not only from the room, but from Brenda and the house.

Everyone of them had watched him flee in stunned silence. Brenda, Kelly and Danna just kept glancing from the door to the spot he was last for a few minutes, while Mr. and Mrs. Walsh only eyed the ajar door concernedly. Brandon was the first to speak, although he was reluctant to leave his sister, he knew Dylan needed him too so, he slowly pushed himself off the floor and told everybody.

"I'll go get him." And then as an after thought he stopped just in the threshold of the door and called out to his sister "Don't you worry, Bren. I'll find him." And with that Brandon turned, stepped outside of threshold and shut the door to set off in pursuit of Dylan.


	2. The Longest Day

**Disclaimer: ** I own neither the plot, nor the series Beverly Hills 90210. The credit for the plot all goes to MargretAndHawkeye4Ever, who has passed the torch down to me, due to writers block. And as for Beverly Hills 90210 it belongs to Paramount and CBS as I have said before and will say again in previous and following chapters to come.

**Author's Note: **Special Thanks to Girlz-Rule and MargretAndHawkeye4Ever for your kind and encouraging words this chapter is dedicated to the both of you.

**Beverly Hills 90210**

**Brenda's Cancer**

**Chapter 2**

**The Longest Day **

It had been two hours since Brandon had went off after Dylan. Kelly and Danna had gone home to give the Walsh family some private time together. And Brenda now sat locked away upstairs in her room thinking about how much she didn't want to believe the route her life had taken in just a few short hours.

She felt as if she was already as good as dead and she didn't even know anything yet, and she wouldn't know anything, at least not until the 15th, when she and her family went to meet with Doctor Danna, Not to mention, Dylan taking off like he had certainly hadn't helped to improve matters. She thought to herself with a sigh, '_If only Dylan were here' _She needed him there to tell her that everything was going to be okay.

* * *

Brandon found Dylan on the roof of the hotel. He sat there slouching with his feet dangling over the side his head buried in his hands.

"Dylan, Are you alright?" Brandon asked him hesitantly, knowing this was a stupid question, of course he wasn't alright. Brenda had breast cancer, nothing and no one was alright least of all Dylan, or he, himself for that matter, but Brandon would worry about his own feelings later, right now he needed to help Dylan through this, and who knows he thought '_maybe in helping Dylan, I might be able to help myself, and I know it would help Brenda. She is going to need him a great deal right now.'_

It wasn't like Dylan hadn't heard Brandon it was just that he didn't know what to say. He was still ashamed with himself for not being of any use back there and for running away. He didn't feel like he deserved to be able to look Brandon in the eye let alone speak to him. He had deserted the one he loved, when she needed him the most and now her brother and his best friend stood before him actively expressing compassion for him by asking if him if he was alright.

"Dylan?" Brandon solicited him after a brief interval had passed and Dylan still hadn't answered.

At last Dylan looked back at him with poignant eyes. He still didn't say anything but at least now Brandon was aware that Dylan even knew that he was there and that was an improvement.

Brenda's parents were in the kitchen together talking as Mrs. Walsh was preparing dinner while all this was going on.

"Jim, I just don't know what to do!" Cindy Walsh was saying with a strained sort of voice as she sliced fresh tomatoes for her famous garden salad.

"Cindy, Honey I don't think anyone knows what to do in these situations. We just have to let her know that she's not alone and that we shouldn't make this into something huge until we know more about it. I mean Doctor Danna didn't even say what kind of breast cancer Brenda has and already this family, probably because of our past experiences with cancer has assumed the worst." Jim Walsh tried to assure his wife.

"You're right Jim, I know your right, but I just- I just can't help thinking about Shelia." Cindy admitted with her head bent sorrowfully. Her husband took a step closer and using his thumb and forefinger he lifted her chin up a bit so that he could look his wife in the eye when he spoke to her.

"We have to think positive now, Cindy. No matter what, even if it is the worst, we can never give up hope, because hope, prayer and positive thinking are what's going to get us through this." Jim told her as he wrapped his arms comfortingly around his wife as she sobbed silently into his chest.

* * *

Dylan just looked at Brandon for a moment as if he couldn't make out what Brandon had asked him, so Brandon tried repeating it now that Dylan was at least looking at him.

"Dylan, Are you alright?" He asked again this time he tried to speak a little more clearly and he didn't hesitate.

"N-N-No, Man, no I'm not." confessed Dylan honestly as he turned his head away from Brandon so that he wouldn't have to face him.

"Yeah- I know, Dude." Was all Brandon could think of to say "I mean that was a dumb question, right?" he added chuckling nervously, and shoving both hands in his pants pockets, as he fumbled for the right thing to say it wasn't like this was some T.V show like, Keep It Together, where the stage was all set and your lines were already written for you this was real life, and in real life you don't have paid writers feeding you scripts with pages full of dialogue to memorize with all the right things to say in these sorts of situations.

Dylan kept his head turned away from Brandon, but nodded silently.

"Dylan, could you please just give me a little more here, I need to know- I mean I don't know exactly what I need to know, I guess…just, Man what are you doing up here?" Brandon asked.

"I'm not ganna jump, if that's what you're asking. I j-just came up here to think. That's all." Dylan stated matter of factly with his head still turned.

If Dylan had been facing Brandon he would have seen that he looked relieved to hear this. "I'm glad to hear that, Man, I really Am." said Brandon as he took a step closer to Dylan from behind. "Mind if I join you?" he asked tentatively.

Dylan shook his head 'no' and Brandon closed the space between them so he could set down adjacent to him.

"So, mind if I ask what exactly you're thinking?" prodded Brandon.

Dylan for probably the third time shook his head 'no' before answering him. "I am thinking about a lot of things, but mostly about how I don't deserve a girl as great as your sister." Dylan told him trying his best to smile and not to grimace as he turned his head in Brandon's direction.

"Ah, man, don't say that. Of course you deserve, Bren. I mean so you got a little scared back there. Don't sweat it; I almost wanted to run out of there myself." Brandon admitted putting his hand on Dylan's shoulder but Dylan just shook it off.

"But you didn't, Man!" he exclaimed suddenly angry and in one swift motion Dylan was on his feet again and was already starting to walk away from him. Brandon stared at him in shock as he began walking a more briskly in the direction of the roof doors.

"Dylan, Wait!" Brandon called as he got to his feet and caught his friends shoulder just as he was about to go through the door, but Dylan just brushed it off again and gave him stern look that caused Brandon to back down.

"Alright" he said looking him in the eye. "But when you've calmed down will you promise to come back to the house and see Brenda, I'm sure she's real worried about you?" he implored.

Dylan nodded, but Brandon looked at him skeptically. "Promise?" he repeated.

"Yes, Alright, I promise. Can I go now?" asked Dylan frustratedly

It was Brandon's turn to nod as Dylan turned and left him there and no more than a few minutes later, Brandon also left the hotel roof but he was headed home as he had already been away far longer than he'd intended.

* * *

Back at home, Brandon found his parents just sitting down to dinner. "Where's Brenda?" he asked as he entered the dinning room area.

"She's upstairs in her room, She's ah- not hungry." His Mom answered.

"Oh." Was all Brandon could think of to say as he sat down silently with his parents to eat, it didn't take the family long to finish their meal as none of them were really all that hungry tonight themselves so shortly after finishing his dinner Brandon excused himself as it had been a long day for all them, probably the longest day the Walsh family had ever seen, so after clearing his plate and kissing his Mom on the cheek, Brandon headed upstairs to try and talk to Brenda before he went to bed.

* * *

Upstairs Brandon knocked lightly on Brenda's door. "Bren, it's Brandon, are you still up?" he called to her through the door uncertainly.

"Yes, I'm awake." She answered quickly. "You can come in if you like." She added.

"You don't have to tell me twice." He said trying to keep things light as he opened her door, stepped inside, closed the door behind him and joined her on her bed all within the span of a few short seconds.

"Hi, Brandon" she greeted him trying hard to give her brother a genuine smile, but you could tell it was forced.

"Hey Bren" He greeted her back trying to do the same, but neither were really up to this yet. It was silent for a moment or so between them before Brenda finally cracked.

"Were you able to catch up with, Dylan? Did you find him? Is he alright?" She bombarded her brother with questions that he really had hoped he wouldn't have had to answer tonight, but he didn't have the heart to ask her to wait another minute let alone till tomorrow so he sighed, then took a deep breath and willed himself to answer.

"No, I wasn't able to catch him, but I was able to find him. And no, Bren, I don't think he's alright, but he promised me as soon as he was ready he would come by the house to see you." Brandon told his twin doing his best to reassure her.

Brenda didn't say anything, just stared off into space looking rather dejected so, Brandon did the only thing he could think of he scooted himself up a little closer to his sister so he could give her reassuring hug.

"Don't worry, Brenda" he told her. "He just needs a little time. He'll come around." Brandon told her trying to sound more assured than he actually felt. He could feel Brenda nod her head 'yes' in response against his shoulder, as they pulled apart he said. "Well, I'm sure you're tired, since it's been a long day for all of us, so I'm going to head off to bed, Goodnight Brenda. I love you" he told her as he got up from the bed.

She nodded. "Good night, Brandon. I love you too." She said as she walked him the few feet to her door and the two siblings exchanged another hug before Brandon headed off to his own bedroom so they could both turn in for the night.


	3. Another Rough Day

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing. Neither this plot, nor the show belongs to me. You can all credit MargretAndHawkeye4Ever for thinking of this brilliant plot. I only wrote the chapters based on it. As for Beverly Hills 90210 well you all know you can thank CBS and Paramount for it.

**Author's Note: **Thank you to all of you who have read and reviewed this so far. I hope that you will keep doing both! And have great day everybody!

-Beastboy4pres052

**Beverly Hills 90210**

**Brenda's Cancer**

**Chapter 3**

**Another Rough Day**

The next day Brenda wasn't really ready to face school so; Mr. and Mrs. Walsh gave her their permission to take a personal day off from school just this once, of which Brenda couldn't have been more thankful for. She was also quite grateful to her brother Brandon this morning as well since he had offered to pick up any assignments that she missed today while she was out that way she wouldn't fall behind.

"Thanks, Brandon I really appreciate this." Brenda told him gratefully as he was headed out the door.

"No problem, Sis." He told her giving her a quick kiss on the cheek and waving to her as he headed out the door. "Love you" he called to her.

"Love you too." She called back to him from the front door as he got in the car and drove off.

* * *

When Brandon at least reached West Beverly High he found his usual parking place and walked briskly up to the building. Once inside he met up with Steve, who was going on about some bogus science test he'd had to make up in his study hall period the other day, Brandon was only half listening of course since his mind was actually busy trying to come up with ways to break the bad news to his friend. Sure, he and Bren hadn't really hung out much and they weren't best friends or anything like that but he was pretty sure Steve would still be upset. Especially since Brandon had come to learn that Steve was actually a lot more sensitive than he let on most of the time.

"Brandon, what's the matter with you? Have you even been listening to a word I've been saying?" barked Steve, who had actually startled Brandon he'd been so lost in thought.

"Well, yes and no." Brandon began. "I heard the firs half, but listen buddy I actually got to tell you something I mean I don't know if Kelly already told you this or not but…Man, I don't really know how to say this so I'm just ganna come right out and ah- say it. Brenda has breast cancer." finished Brandon earnestly.

Steve instantly stopped walking and just kind of stood there beside his friend with this stunned look frozen on his face. "When did you find all this out?" he asked dumbfounded.

"Well, Brenda found the lump just before the SATs and she had here biopsy done while we were scheduled to be taking them, that's why I left during them. I just couldn't concentrate…well, anyway we got the call yesterday probably some time after you were done testing." He finished telling his curly haired friend.

"What kind is it?" Steve asked still looking quite stunned, but at least the two had started walking again and weren't going to be late for class.

"We don't know yet. Doctor Danna, that's my sister's physician, she wants us to come in tomorrow at five to have a meeting with her so that she can give us more information and we can get all the answers to our questions stuff then." Brandon informed Steve who was beginning to gain some color in his cheeks so Brandon guessed the initial shock was wearing off a little bit, but he was sure that Steve was still a little upset by how he just wouldn't stop looking over at him worriedly as they made their way to class before they entered their first block classroom though Steve had one more question.

"Man, are you sure that you're alright? I mean you don't seem to be taking this as hard as I would have thought. I always thought you and your sister were real tight?" asked Steve concerned.

"Well, can I be straight with you, Steve?" Brandon asked.

Steve nodded and looked at his buddy attentively.

"Honestly, inside I'm a total wreck, it's just that-"Brandon gulped and fought back the urge to let the tears that were dangerously close to slipping fall out. "Well, somebody's got to take care of Brenda, My Mom's a complete wreck inside and out, because well you see her sister, my Aunt Shelia, just died a few years ago from cancer so this is just really tough for her to go through right now. And My Dads barely around he's been so busy with work and stuff and Dylan wigged out on us yesterday when we got the call and-"

"Oh, Man, poor Brenda, Dylan actually wigged?" interrupted Steve shocked.

Brandon nodded. "Yeah, I've never seen him look so upset before, it was awful. Especially since I feel so helpless, I mean haven't really had time to process my own feelings I've been so busy trying to deal with everyone else's" said Brandon sniffling a little.

Steve put his hand on Brandon's shoulder. "Well, you know if you ever need someone to talk too, I'm here for you, Man." Steve reminded him with a warm smile. "I mean you've always been here for me, so it's the least I can do." Steve finished.

"I know and Thanks, Steve you've actually already helped me a lot." Brandon informed him.

"Yeah, well what are friends for anyway." Steve told him humbly but then he cleared his throat to let Brandon know he still had one more thing to add on a more serious note before they could head into the classroom. "But, seriously Man, call me tomorrow when you and your family get back and let me know what's going on alright?"

Brandon nodded. "Sure thing, Steve." He said giving his friend a warm smile to show him his gratitude for both the talk and his concern.

* * *

When Brandon got off school, he went directly home. He wanted to spend as much time with his sister as possible, for one thing he just felt an overwhelming need to be there in case she needed him for anything and for another he just didn't feel much like being anywhere else with large crowds. His school day had been more exhausting than he'd thought it was going to be, after his talk with Steve, plus going to his own classes, dealing with problems at the press for the school paper, and not to mention having to tell all Brenda's teachers why his sister had been absent as he picked her assignments had been harder than he'd thought. Each time he saw a new teacher and had to tell them about the other day he nearly cried, but he kept telling himself not here, so now that he was home, he used the last of strength to let Brenda know that he would be in his room if she needed him before he finally made to the sanctity of his room where he shut, and locked his door before laying down on his bed atop his comforter, where he brought a pillow up to his face and cried himself to sleep.

* * *

**Author's Note:** I know kind of a short one; sorry but things will get going more in the next chapter because that's when the Walsh family meets with Doctor Danna and we finally learn more about Brenda's situation. Well anyway, I want to say another **special thanks to****MargretAndHawkeye4Ever** for her very helpful review for chapter 2, so thank you very much MargretAndHawkeye4Ever I hope you liked this chapter. And to the rest of you reader's & reviewer's don't think I've forgotten you because I haven't.lol Thank you all too! & You all have a good one! 


	4. And the Rough Days Just Keep on Coming

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing. Neither the idea for this fic, nor the show it pertains to truly belong to me. Beverly Hills 90210 belongs to Aaron Spelling, Paramount, and CBS. The plot for this fan-fic was bestowed on me by MargretAndHawkEye4Ever.

**Author's Note: **First of allThanks to all of you who have read and reviewed thus far. I hope you will all continue to do both! Secondly, I do apologize for the wait. I have been extremely busy as of late. Thirdly, I would like to state that some of this information may be somewhat implausible, but I would like everyone to keep in mind that this is fiction after all and Fourthly I just want to warn everybody that this fic could get pretty sad and dramatic from this point on. Also I want to ensure everyone that I will finish this fic but updates could take awhile as I have three other fics I am currently working on, plus my job and plus any other tid bits life would like to throw my way, well I believe that's all and without further ado here I present to you…

**Beverly Hills 90210 **

**Brenda's Cancer **

**Chapter 4 **

**And the Rough Days Just Keep on Coming**

It was a Saturday, but it wasn't just any ordinary Saturday no matter how the Walsh family wished it was or that it could be otherwise. Both their twins spent a majority of the day in their rooms avoiding the outside world.

Brenda was so scared she could hardly breathe, let alone think straight, she knew that whatever information Doctor Donna was going to give them about her cancer couldn't be good because otherwise '_why wouldn't she have just told them over the phone? Why would they need to come in and have a meeting about it?' _And Brandon well he tossed and turned in his bed in his room as he tried to force himself to go back to sleep rather than think about what was to come his thoughts were much like that of his sisters and he didn't want to think about her having to go through what Shelia had to go through it hurt him to much.

Finally the dreaded time at last came and the Walsh family silently got in the car and drove down to the clinic together each of them a million miles apart in their own minds, even though they all sat in the same vehicle together. Mr. and Mrs. Walsh in the front and Brenda and Brandon in back seats ironically all them right there with each other but somehow not.

When they at last arrived in the parking lot of the clinic, the family all still silent exited the car and walked slowly up to and into the building. Mr. Walsh assertively walked up to the desk and told a woman behind the desk who they were and who they were there to see and then as the woman handed him a clip board the rest of the family went over to the waiting area to sit down. About two minutes later Mr. Walsh joined them and then about five minutes later Brenda's name was called and in unison the family stood and followed a different young woman to Doctor Danna's office, where a little less than three minutes later Doctor Danna joined them.

"Hello Mr. and Mrs. Walsh, Brenda and Brandon." Greeted Doctor Danna as she stepped inside and shut the door.

"Hello Doctor Donna" Mr. Walsh replied for all of them as she took her seat and the family eyed her expectantly while she reviewed her clip board. '_This part of my job is never easy and no matter how many times I have to do this it never gets any easier ' _thought the female physician sadly as she tried to distance herself from the case as best she could after all, she'd grown quite found of Brenda and hadn't really expected to have to tell such a brave and young woman such terrible news.

"Well, I am sure you're all wondering about my reasons behind having you all meet with me here today. I know that of course, you are aware that Brenda has Breast Cancer but I did not give you very much information on the phone and that is because of the severity of the case. I am sorry to have to tell you this but Brenda has a very aggressive and advanced case of Stage three A Invasive Ductal Carcinoma or IDC Breast Cancer." The Doctor said trying to put it as delicately and as plain as she could.

"Pardon me, Doctor, but what exactly does all that mean?" asked Mr. Walsh doing his best to restrain his emotions and obtain the necessary information on his daughters illness so that he could be the strong parent that Brenda was going to need right now to make the most effective and important decisions for her about treatment.

"IDC as I have already tried to explain is a type of invasive Breast Cancer. It is actually one of the most common types of Breast Cancer found in woman today. Eighty percent of women suffer from this particular type of Breast cancer, though in Brenda's case it is the stage that it is at that concerns me. Brenda," said the Doctor now turning to her patient. "I am sorry, but this cancer has advanced like these types of cancers do via your bloodstream and has infected other areas of your body, so much in fact that is already considered to be at Stage Three A. Now what that means, Mr. Walsh," said the Doctor redirecting her attention to Brenda's father. "Is that the invasive cancer has grown larger than five centimeters and has spread well into the under arm, and lymph nodes. Plus since it has made its way into Brenda's bloodstream there isn't much we can do for her now treatment wise at this advanced stage, except maybe ease the pain and I guess what I am trying to say is that, Brenda," she said returning her focus once again to her patient. "You have maybe six months to live." The Doctor finished sadly and after a brief pause she added. "I am very sorry."

The silence in the room was almost deafening. Mrs. Walsh had covered her mouth with one of her hands and had the other wrapped around her stomach and was now bent over like she might be sick and her world was spinning, as it was becoming harder for her to breathe until she finally passed out and although Mr. Walsh had caught her he looked a sickly pale color that would have made anyone worry that he might pass out himself at any minute and Brandon could have matched his parents sickly colors except that he couldn't have passed out even if he'd wanted to. His head was a whirl wind, and his eyes shown with unshed tears and their was a look in them that Brenda had never seen, a look of such heartbreaking tumultuous turmoil that his eyes reminded her of the pictures she'd seen of the center of a tornado, in its calm before the eye of the storm hit and then, there was she, herself. She was another story. She was so scared, she could feel it but in all honesty it felt like this was all happening to someone else. She wanted to retreat back to her mistake theory once more to make it all go away but she knew that was impossible now. This was it. She was dying.

* * *

**Author's Note Continued: **I know, kind of a wicked note for me to leave off on and yes, a bit short but none the less effective, right? Let me know what you all think, please!

P.S. How many of you besides me bought the second season of Beverly Hills 90210 on May 1st when it came out?

Well anyway G2G,

-Beastboy4pres052


	5. A Step in the Right Direction

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Beverly Hills 90210 it is however owned by Paramount, CBS, and Aaron Spelling.

**Author's Note**: First of all Thanks for reading & Second of all I would like to apologize for the wait, I have been very busy with work and other things so I am sorry that this took so long and whereas I would like to say it won't ever happen again I hate to say it but I assure you that it might. I will soon be working SIX days a week which will leave me little time to write however I promise to write when I can and update as soon as I write because that is all I can promise. I hope you will all be patient with me and keep reading. Once again Thank you and now here's…

P.S. This chapter is dedicated to MargeretAndHawkEye4Ever for two reasons. One she is the one who gave me the idea for this fic and Two, she only asked one thing of me when I took it on and this chapter sort of works on that. I hope you enjoy this chapter especially MargeretAndHawkEye4Ever.

**Beverly Hills 90210 **

**Brenda's Cancer **

**Chapter 5**

**A Step in the Right Direction **

How ironic that it was Sunday. 'Solemn Sunday 'Brenda thought alone in her room which was she had opted to spend her day. She couldn't face her family. Her Parents still hadn't really recovered from the shock of what Doctor Danna had told them just yesterday afternoon _'had it really been just yesterday?' _Brenda thought as today felt like it had went by at the speed a decade might have. Her mother's face kept flashing through her mind along with Brandon's eyes and she just couldn't bare it. She lay in her bed staring at up at her ceiling and letting the silent tears stream down her face unabashed because there was no one there to see…

Mrs. Walsh had opted to spend the day keeping busy. She was currently in the kitchen baking her sixth batch of a dozen chocolate chip cookies. Never mind what the Walsh family would do with them it was just the act of making them that Mrs. Walsh needed.

As for Mr. Walsh he was off on Sundays as he often was, but he didn't really know what to with himself. For the first time in a long time he felt very out of control of things and he didn't like the feeling. He had been so sure that whatever Brenda had it would be treatable at least to some degree, but this-this he had been totally unprepared for.

Brandon was in his room talking on the phone with Steve. Yesterday what with the news and all he-he had forgotten about his promise to call his friend and tell him what was going on, so feeling the need to talk to someone he was calling him now.

"Hi Steve" Brandon greeted neutrally when his friend picked up.

"Ah, Hey Brandon I was wondering when I'd hear from you. How did Brenda's thing go at the Doctor?" Steve asked.

"St-Steve she's- got maybe six months" Brandon stammered barely keeping it together enough to say that. He'd almost said she was-'_dy-dying'_ but he couldn't even bare to think that let alone say it out-loud so he'd said it the only way he knew how.

"Six months till what man?" Steve asked not understanding what his friend had been trying to say without really saying it.

"She got maybe six months to-to live" Brandon repeated.

The phone went dead silent for a moment while Steve processed this information. After a few seconds Steve finally spoke.

"I'm coming over." He said and hung up before Brandon could say anything.

After Brandon mentally shook himself he called to his Mom in the kitchen. "Mom, Steve's coming for dinner!"

* * *

Less than an hour later Steve appeared at the Walsh's doorstep and was let in by Brandon. 

"Hey Bran" greeted Steve as he was ushered inside by his good friend.

"Hey" Brandon returned as he shut the door and the two boys made their way in silence up the stairs to Brandon's room so they could talk.

* * *

Once in Brandon's Room. Brandon shut the door and the two made themselves comfortable before speaking. 

"So, how's Bren taking this?" Steve asked dumbly as he wasn't sure what to say in a situation like this seeing as how he'd never been in a situation like this.

Brandon looked at him for a moment but he knew what Steve meant so with a heavy sigh he answered him. "About like you'd imagine. After we left the Doctor's office she barley said two words and she hasn't left her room once today." Brandon admitted.

Steve nodded. "Has anyone tried talking to her?" He asked a minute later.

"I knocked on her door earlier but she just told me she'd like to be left alone please and I left it at that." Brandon told him.

There was a pause. "Do you think maybe I could try talking to her?" Steve asked hesitantly. Steve and Brenda hadn't exactly spent any real time together, so their friendship wasn't in actuality so much a friendship as an mutual acquaintanceship so Steve wasn't sure why he wanted to talk to her or even what he was going to say he just wanted to help his friends and he considered Brenda a friend, maybe not a close friend but a friend none the less and besides maybe this was a chance to change that. He'd always liked Brenda not in the way he liked other girls, sure she was pretty but he just didn't see her that way, probably because of his strong feelings for Kelly.

Brandon shook his head. "I don't see why not." He said shrugging his shoulders and standing up to get the door for his friend to point him in the direction of his sister's room.

Brandon not only pointed down the short hall but walked Steve to the door. Where he waited to see what would happen as Steve lightly wrapped on the young girls bedroom door.

"Wh-who is it?" Brenda answered the light wrapping you could tell she had been crying by her voice and this made Brandon's heart fill with a soft ache.

"It's Steve" Steve called to her through the door. "Mind if I come in?"

Brenda sat up in bed for a moment unsure what to say. She hadn't expected this. She had expected it be Brandon again or maybe even her Mother, but then again her Mother hadn't so much as been able to look at her since they'd been home. After thinking for a moment she decided she might as well let him in.

"S-Sure" she stammered as she wiped at her puffy eyes, Brandon was surprised and a little put off by his sisters response as she hadn't wanted to talk to him earlier, he'd thought surely Steve would get a similar response but somehow Steve was different he supposed and he waited outside the door as Steve slowly opened it and stepped inside.

* * *

Steve shut Brenda's door behind him and made his way over to join her on her bed.

"Heh-hey Bren" he greeted awkwardly as he sat down next to her.

"Hey" she practically whispered head bent, not looking him in the eyes whilst her fingers were busy twiddling with some lose bit of string on her comforter. Even without her looking him in the eyes he knew she'd been crying it was evident in her manner as well as her speech and Steve didn't know what to say, in fact he still didn't know what he'd expected to accomplish by coming to speak with her anyways.

"Brandon told me what the Doctor said." He admitted to her for some reason he felt like he should confess something to her and that was the only admission that he could think of for some reason.

She nodded. "I figured." She responded quietly.

"Bren, ugh I know this- this may sound stupid but I- I'm sorry." He finished and she finally turned her head to look at him, a bit funny but she still looked him in the eye before she spoke again.

"Don't be, its not your fault." She told him sadly.

Steve nodded. "I know. I know it's no ones fault bu-but it still sucks, you know?" he said to her feeling stupid but he watched surprised as she gave him something between a half smile and half grimace in response.

"You're right. It does suck." She agreed and the two sat in silent agreement for the moment until Steve spoke again.

"You know what Bren?"

"What?" she asked somehow finding it hard to believe that she actually felt better, not a whole lot better but better than she had felt a second ago.

"I was just thinking that you and I haven't really ever talked before- before now and you know what? This is nice. I feel oddly comfortable yet uncomfortable right now with you. Comfortable in the sense of with you as a person and uncomfortable because of the circumstances you know? Does that even make sense?" He asked her suddenly feeling a bit self conscious he'd never said anything like that before it felt somewhat out of character for him but yet not. He remembered how alone he felt on his birthdays thinking about his real Mother and this made him wonder how alone Brenda felt now? Facing death? And that's when it really dawned on him how hard this had to be for her.

Brenda nodded to his earlier statement but was surprised when she looked into his eyes again and saw the revelation in them and the two suddenly had instant transfer of understanding and before Brenda knew it the silent tears that had been falling earlier had returned but for some reason she didn't feel the need to hide them from him and she was even more surprised when she saw one of Steve's arms raise and he reached that arm around her back so he could gently pat and rub it as she silently let the tears fall with him there.

* * *

A few hours later Mrs. Walsh in a kind of shaky voice called every one down to dinner and that's when Steve and much to Brandon's surprise Brenda emerged. Brenda looked a paradox. She appeared a mess on the outside and her eyes though puffy still somehow looked better, sure something like this wasn't going to get easier or better in a day not that he figured this could get better only worse but it felt good to see Brenda at least and maybe that was a step in the right direction.

* * *

**Author's Note Continued: **Well? Any Comments? Questions? Concerns? You know what to do. Review! 


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